emERgency

Now that it's all over, I've calmed down and I know that everything is okay I can write this post. I'm a little hesitant because of the guilt and shame, but I want to document it so I can hopefully look back at it someday and remind myself of how stupid I was.

I am officially OUT of the running for the "Mother of the Year" award. Why is that? Morgan fell out of her car seat yesterday on to the concrete garage floor (insert guilt and shame here). I went to get my hair done yesterday and while we were there she fell asleep in my arms. So I put her in her car seat, inserted paci and covered her up to her neck with her blanket. When we left an hour later I put her in the car and we headed home. As I grabbed the seat out of the car and turned to start walking I heard a noise. I thought "what the heck was that"? It was Morgan, lying on the ground. As you can imagine I lost it. I picked her up and ran into the house. I immediately called Michael who came home. Then I called the pediatrician who told me to take her straight to the ER to make sure everything was okay. I stripped her down to try and find out where she hit. I found nothing. Not a red mark on her. Shouldn't there be a bump or something? By this time Michael was home so we loaded her up and off we went. Morgan slept the whole way there which worried me even more.

At the ER I had to tell the nurse what happen. All I could do was cry and think about what a horrible parent I was. All of the nurses at Wolfson assured me that I was not the first person that this happen to and I wouldn't be the last. It helped a little, but I just wanted her to be okay. We were taken back and while we waited for the doc Morgan was cooing and smiling like I've never seen her do before. On the outside she seemed totally fine. The doc checked her out and said the same thing, but because of her age and the fact that she fell on concrete she ordered a CT scan just to make sure there was nothing internally wrong. I was able to be in the room with her and all I could do was look at her, sound asleep in that big machine, and cry. Three hours after arriving we were told that she was perfectly fine. We were told to just watch her and make sure that she was eating and waking up when she normally does. She made it through the night with flying colors.

Morgan fell out of the car seat because I forgot to buckle her in when we left the hair salon. She was sound asleep and covered up that I didn't even think to check the straps. 99% of the time when she is in the seat she is strapped in so it never crossed my mind. And to add to that, the bar on the car seat was not in the center position when I took her out of the car. It was one click toward the back which means when I turned and dropped my left hand to carry her with one hand the entire seat tilted forward and she slid right out.

I am so THANKFUL that she is okay. It really could have been a lot worse. I keep playing the whole scenario over and over in my head and I still don't know exactly what happen. How far did she fall? What was that noise that I heard? Was it her hitting the ground or was it one of the toys in the garage falling because I hit it with the seat? What part of her body did she hit? I honestly think that I will never know. It all happen so fast and I just wanted to hold her in my arms.

I can promise you that I will always check and double check to make sure that they are both strapped in to their seats. I never want to feel again what I felt yesterday when I saw her lying on the ground. It broke my heart.

Seeing her smile makes it better though.

New York

She really does love it! She told me so. And I love the little smile I caught.

And here are some of the many faces that I got that day.

Happy Father's Day

We all piled in the bed this morning for a little daddy time. Happy Father's Day Michael. You're the best daddy and we all love you so much.

To my Dad - I know we don't see each other often, but I want you to know that I love you very much. I always know that you are just a phone call away and you'll listen no matter what. And these two little girls here can't wait to give you kisses.

To Jim - We're lucky to have you in our lives. Thanks for everything that you do for me and the girls. We love you!

Bubbles

Although it was very hot, Addison and I had a great time at her school luau. And the bubble lady was a huge hit. There were bubbles everywhere! I'm thinking about hiring her for my next party.


My new favorite picture of Addison! Pure joy.

Thanks Andrew!

Addison and Morgan got a package in the mail from their cousin Andrew last week. Addison got a new puzzle and must have played with it all weekend (over and over). It's her first real puzzle and she's actually doing a lot better at it than I thought she would.



Thanks Andrew for the puzzle and the panda. Addison and Morgan love them!

One month

Morgan turned one month old yesterday. Addison and I celebrated by singing Happy Birthday to her when she woke up. My life may be a little crazy right now, but I wouldn't change it for anything. I love the girls so much. It feels like they were always supposed to be here and be mine.

I took Morgan to her one month appt yesterday afternoon. Note to self, NEVER go to the doctor on a Monday! Other than the cold that we both have she's as healthy as can be. She weighed in at 9 lbs, 3 oz and was 21.5 inches long. She was supposed to get her first vaccine, but the doc decided to wait because of the cold. She really is perfect!

Cookie Cake

What could be better? You get the best of both worlds.

This was Cole's birthday pool party last weekend. Addison was lounging at the side of the pool eating her cake.

And when she turned around we saw this.

I think she liked it.

Evicted

Morgan slept in her crib for the first time Saturday night. As much as I love having her in our room it was time for the move. She is such a grunter. I'm never sure if she's falling asleep, waking up, or just stretching because she grunts every time she moves. I think we're both sleeping better now. She's seems to be in somewhat of a routine now. I wake her up at 10 to eat before I go to bed. Then she's up at roughly 1:30 and 4:30. I will take 3 hours of sleep any time.

But she still likes napping in the swing.

** After typing this post earlier in the week, Morgan had to "one up" me. She went down last night and woke up at 2:30 and then again at 6. She is four weeks old today so maybe she's feeling all grown up. :)

Fun in the sun

On Sunday we took the girls to the beach. Morgan had a great time hanging out in the car seat, eating, and lounging in my lap. We were lucky to have a small breeze off the ocean so it turned out to be really nice and not too hot. And I'm loving our new pop up tent my mom got us.

Dinner time (yes, there is a baby under there). Or maybe it was lunch or snack. Not sure, but it happens a lot. It's funny how you don't care as much with your second child.


Let me just tell you how much this girl loves the beach. Any water for that matter. Michael did a lot of back and forth to the water since I never left the shade. He's such a good dad.

Problems

My home computer has some kind of virus or something. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. So if you don't hear from me then that's why.